Finding out you are expecting two babies will be one of the most amazing blessings as a mom. You may be completely excited and overwhelmed all at the same time. Soon after the shock of having twins wears off, you will wonder how raising two will be possible. It’s not only possible but also incredibly rewarding with a bit of preparation and support.
Where Do I Begin?
When preparing for the new littles and adjustments, it is important to become educated on all things twins. The demands and responsibilities with twins are doubled and preparation is key.
Attending an Expecting Twins class in your area will be incredibly helpful for you and your partner to ask questions and become informed on gear you will need for your babies and what you can do without. Information on how to get babies on a sleep schedule is a common question among twin parents, and through a class, you will get useful information on how to implement these strategies when you bring your babies home. Also, how to feed babies at the same time is often twin parents’ number one concern. Taking breastfeeding and sleep classes geared specifically for twins will help prepare parents in the long run and leave you well-equipped for what’s to expect.
We also highly suggest a CPR class to anyone who will look after babies, as this will add peace of mind to prepare in any unexpected situation.
We encourage that all the preparation be done by 30 weeks, as over 50% of moms carrying multiple babies may be put on modified bed rest for the remainder of the pregnancy. Having your stroller and car seats are a must early on, in addition to their sleeping solutions. You can do everything else gear-wise online!
Help is a Must!
Planning for family and friends to come over and help will make life with newborn twins less overwhelming.
Posting a list on the fridge of little tasks that family may tackle when they come over will relieve some of the workload off of the new, exhausted, sleep-deprived parents!
If you are not close to family and friends who can help, getting outside help (such as a postpartum doula) who can come over a few days to help out in the mornings or afternoons to relieve mom for a bit may be beneficial. This will help immensely with feeling overwhelmed that you may not get to all the chores around the house, plus tend to babies round the clock. This may only need to be for a bit in the beginning stages until you get your bearings.
Although this may be easier said than done initially, building those attachments early on can be beneficial for Mom and each baby. Planning for a little one-on-one with each baby doesn’t have to be long stretches of time. It may be a feeding, a cuddle moment, or a babywearing session. For years to come, they will feel like a unit instead of like two individual little beings. It will become apparent that spending time with each one will build an incredible bond for each baby with each parent.
Fellow Twin Moms
Making twin mom friends may sound so far-fetched with newborn twins in tow that you may think, “I will never leave the house to make friends,” but you can do this in baby steps.
Early on, you may start doing this through Facebook support groups in your city and national groups, where you will find amazing support through the comfort of your phone. Knowing someone is going through the same thing as you will feel reassuring. Once your babies get a bit older, seek out the Twins Club in your area and meet fellow Twin Moms. All it takes is one connection with another Twin Mom to share on your journey.
Be Kind to Yourself
This is so important as a new mom and especially as a new mom to TWO little beings. You can plan, but parenthood may not go according to that plan. And this goes for everything from delivery, to breastfeeding, to connecting with your babies, to feeling like yourself again, or being that wife, daughter, sister, or friend to your loved ones.
Take it easy on yourself; it will all be a transition at first as you get your bearings. You and the babies are learning as you go. Accept help from people around you with household chores and with the babies. Take the time to take a shower or eat a meal. It’s all about taking it one day at a time until you can manage everything on your own. Embrace the beginning stages, as hard as they may seem; soon enough, it will be a distant memory, and you’ll wish you could go back, even for a moment!