We Didn’t Mean to Start Co-Sleeping

We Didn't Mean to Start Co-Sleeping | Baby Chick

We Didn’t Mean to Start Co-Sleeping

Co-sleeping.

Uttering the very notion of this parenting practice can whip my mom friends into a frenzy, with some being for it and others against it: but me, personally? I began my motherhood journey as a staunch adversary of co-sleeping. I was perched atop my high horse with my arms firmly folded: no, co-sleeping was not for us. As a mom with postpartum anxiety (and just being neurotic in general), the thought of co-sleeping made me feel very uneasy. I’d done some research, and saw that co-sleeping was sometimes linked to SIDS; and anything with that horrible word in it was enough to make me want to take a blood oath against it. For the first 7 months of our girl’s life, she was an independent bassinet sleeper in our room, nestled safely into her mesh-sided slumber center night after night.

Then, this homegirl had the audacity to go and get a mind of her own.

Enter sleep regression, frustration, and feeling like the worst parents on the planet when our once wonderful sleeper wasn’t resting well, was waking up frightened, and getting grumpier by the moment due to lack of sleep—and she wasn’t the only one. We knew something had to be done, and when our high horse named “struggle bus” arrived at the stop titled “last resort,” we got off.

We removed our pillows and blankets from the bed, pushed the mattress as firmly against the wall as we could (to close off any gaps—a hazard for little babes), and laid our girl down in the middle of our king sized bed one night, wringing our hands together as we watched her doze off. My husband and I stood there and listened to the rhythmic patterns of her deep breathing, and I suppose we eventually fell asleep, too. We all three awoke the next morning like we were straight out of a Disney cartoon movie. There were birds and music coming from somewhere; I’m sure of it. We’d all gotten a solid night’s sleep, and woke up feeling like new people. We woke up feeling like people that might co-sleep again the next night, and the night after that.

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It’s been nearly a month of this blissful state of being well-rested—when she wakes up in need of comfort or a bit of a snack, I find myself rolling over and able to provide that for her. We all feel so much better, and as a result, are functioning like normal human beings again.

I felt awful initially for abandoning what I thought were my “principles;” I’d talked so much smack about co-sleeping that I was unable to actually admit to anyone that we were doing it, much less ask for guidance as we set about doing it. I’d never tried to intentionally shame anyone who was about that shared-bed lifestyle, but had inadvertently done so to one of my girlfriends. All of my proverbial finger-wagging had her feeling badly about her choice to co-sleep, and finding this out made me immediately want to crawl into a hole.

I’d said things like “it’s selfish” or “dangerous,” when what I really meant and didn’t clarify was that it scared me. It scared me to think that my not-on-the-thin-side self could roll over and accidentally smoosh my squish. It scared me to think of things unspeakable, like SIDS, and those fears seeped into my conversations with friends who were co-sleeping. I’d always made it a point to never make people around me feel judged, yet here we were in the worst judgment territory: making another mom, who was doing her very best by her babies, feel inadequate.

After making a long and sheepish apology to this friend, she half-smirked at me, saying “I knew you’d try it eventually. It sometimes just happens. You can worry all you want, but at the end of the day you’ll do what’s best for your girl”.

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Her kindness and compassion smacked me in the soul, and even though talks of moving to the crib have picked up traction in our household (as we’ve discovered, among many things, that co-sleeping with a baby means less co-sexing in our bed), we are secretly relishing these sweet nighttime cuddles. We’ve made our bed, we’re all lying in it, and that high horse we rode in on? It’s running around freely outside somewhere, hoping we don’t hop back on for a while.

About the Author /

Old mom to a chocolate lab and new mom to a baby girl, former teacher and current higher education professional.

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📷: @boo.b.ltd
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📷: @humorandwine⁠
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Instagram post 17899717765403522 ❤️ How to Help When Visiting a New Mom – Podcast Ep 21 ❤️⁠
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Becoming a new mother, whether it be your first baby or your sixth, is filled with so many emotions. 🎢 Figuring out your new normal can take a minute as you recover from giving birth and get to know your new baby. People will be at your doorstep in no time wanting to congratulate you and meet your baby, but sometimes people aren't necessarily thinking about what they can do for YOU to be helpful. If you know someone who has recently had a baby or if you are currently expecting, today’s podcast episode is for you! ❤️ {Link in bio!}⁠
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This episode is brought to you by @skylightframe. It's a digital picture frame that has a touch-screen display that documents all of your family’s special moments—a great gift for yourself or for an expecting or new mom. If you want to bring a nice gift when visiting a new mom, be sure to check out Skylight Frame and use our discount code BABYCHICK for $10 off your order! #ad #skylightframe⁠
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Instagram post 17920976449353517 💪 Mom Hacks for Staying Fit After Having Kids⁠
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Going to keep it real here, your fitness game is going to change after having kids. If you were crushing it before having babies, you're going to find that the free time for working out isn't what is used to be.⁠
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Regardless of where you were at, there are things you can do to make your heath a priority and be a good example to your little ones.⁠
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1. Don't rush back. There's no gold star here. Take your time, get the clearance from your OB/midwife and start when you're ready.⁠
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2. Schedule your workouts. Like most things in life now, you're on a schedule. Create time in your new life for you -- you'll thank yourself later.⁠
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3. Ask for Help. Chances are high that the Mom down the street is looking for some kid free time as well. You take an hour, she takes an hour and we're all better off for it.⁠
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4.  Embrace the little things. Your day will present opportunities to get your butt moving. Find them.⁠
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5. Get a new outfit. Because, duh.⁠
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Words & 📸 : @juna.moms⁠
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When you meet your baby(ies) and your whole world changes. 💕
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Speak your partner's love language in postpartum. Send this resource to your loved one so that they can make you feel loved and supported in a meaningful way.⁠
Words & 📸: @birthbossco⁠
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Instagram post 17934950050319412 EXACTLY! 🙌 I wish more moms knew this and didn't feel pressured to say yes automatically to guests--of course, unless they want to! 😊 But you can always say no and not right now. Take your time to bond with your new baby. If you want people to come over, great! But don't feel bad if you don't and want more time alone with your family. People who love you should understand. ❤️⁠
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Instagram post 17857907638591275 Dinner time with toddlers can oftentimes be hectic and stressful. Sometimes they’ll eat what you’ve made them and other times they won’t. 😒 We’ve been there! This is why we are sharing two yummy dinner recipes that have been toddler approved that the whole family can enjoy—Taco Pizza and Stuffed Sweet Potatoes! 😋
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We substituted sour cream in these recipes with @stonyfield YoBaby yogurt because it provides not only the calcium they need, but also probiotics, protein and vitamin D! 👍 (Our pediatrician says our little guy needs 2-4 servings of dairy per day!) The yogurt still has that tangy flavor that you’re looking for but with even more benefits! Cheers to full tummies and happy families! 🙌 #ad #stonyfield
📹: @trippfilms
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