5 Parenting Tips From My Mother-In-Law That I Couldn’t Follow

5 Parenting Tips From My Mother-In-Law That I Couldn't Follow | Baby Chick

5 Parenting Tips From My Mother-In-Law That I Couldn’t Follow

My partner’s mom was a wonderful woman. She was very supportive of our little family, and she was a loving grandma. As a daycare provider for many years, my mother-in-law was also the closest thing to an expert on kids in my small circle.

We got along great, unlike many women do with their mother-in-laws. And unlike many new moms, I didn’t clash with her when it came to parenting my baby boy. I never felt disrespected by her. Not even in terms of parenting. Maybe that’s why I never felt compelled to object to any of the well-meaning advice she gave me!

My mother-in-law doled out the tips, and I was happy to take them. Usually. There were times I had to look the other way and do my own thing, though. Here’s some of the stuff I just couldn’t stick with.

1. Don’t Rock Your Baby To Sleep

My partner and I were visiting his mom for the first time since we found out I was pregnant. We didn’t see her often since we lived six hours apart.

At one point during that visit, we talked about some baby basics. Both bewildered and excited, I asked what her number one bit of advice for me was. She didn’t hesitate before saying, “Never rock your baby to sleep. You’ll regret it.”

If I wasn’t confused before, that one did me in for sure. Isn’t that what rocking chairs are made for? Isn’t that what those cute little rock-n-plays are specifically designed for?

Before my baby was born, I gave her the benefit of the doubt on that one. My mother-in-law never said not to comfort the baby by rocking him, just not to let him fall asleep like that. I had a fancy new rocking glider for breastfeeding that she practically insisted on, after all.

She said rocking a baby to sleep would ruin his self-soothing abilities and “spoil him” into wanting to be held all the time. But once that little bundle was born, I listened to my heart and instincts, consequences be damned. Every breastfeeding session ended in me rocking him to sleep in our new glider. And you know what? I did that as much for myself as for him. That bonding time was exactly what we needed. So peaceful and soothing, those special moments relieved any stress I was dealing with.

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Yes, it took a bit longer for my son to learn to sleep on his own. But it was so worth it. I’m not a proponent of the cry-it-out method anyway, so I spent as much time as I needed to in order for him to feel comfortable enough to sleep.

I don’t believe babies can be spoiled. If they cry or fuss, they do so for a reason. Mommy’s comforting touch coupled with a soothing motion is reason enough in my book.

2. Don’t Room-Share

Along the lines of sleep, my partner’s mom gave me another piece of advice: A baby should sleep exclusively in his nursery. Definitely don’t co-sleep, but also don’t room-share.

She helped us set up a beautiful nursery, complete with brand new furniture and fun crib accessories. But the baby never slept a full night in there. Not once. In fact, he never slept there unless I put him down for a quick nap as I escaped into a good book in the next room.

Truthfully, I understood and agreed with the no co-sleeping rule, and I was concerned about the dangers of bed-sharing.

However, we lived in a loft-style apartment at the time, which meant that our bedroom was upstairs and separate from all other rooms. There was no way I felt comfortable leaving a baby to sleep in a downstairs room while I attempted sleep upstairs. When I told my partner’s mom why we set up the baby’s bassinet in our room, she understood but tried to convince me to put him back in his nursery. She was convinced that he’d be okay, and I had a baby monitor after all.

A baby monitor wasn’t going to soothe anyone back to sleep after a wet diaper, though, and it couldn’t do CPR. My instincts told me that I needed my baby nearby, so that’s where he stayed until we moved to our new house.

3. Just Heat The Formula Up In The Microwave

Once when she visited us, my partner’s mom watched me use a bottle warmer.

“Why don’t you just heat the formula up in the microwave?” she asked.

I didn’t realize people still did this, to tell the truth. I thought it was a well-known fact that formula shouldn’t be warmed in the microwave. Microwaves create pockets of hot air bubbles that could burn baby’s tongue while drinking. Even if the bottle seems to be at a safe feeding temperature, the small hot spots can hurt baby’s mouth and throat.

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I was surprised that a daycare provider of many years didn’t know the up-to-date info on how to safely warm a bottle. But everyone does childcare slightly different, I suppose. What was accurate in the 70’s and 80’s should also be good for today’s babies, according to a certain mindset.

I, personally, prefer to follow the latest recommendations. Maybe that makes me a little uptight as a mom, but I figure that the data wouldn’t be updated if the new information wasn’t important.

4. Start With The Sweet Baby Food

My mother-in-law was a proponent of baby-led weaning in some form. Although she didn’t call it by name, she promoted feeding regular food to a baby as soon as they could manage more than milk.

She urged me to feed baby whatever I was eating. But prior to this, my partner’s mom gave me some pointers on baby food. She said to start out with bananas or a similar pureed food, because baby would be more likely to eat it.

After doing some research of my own, I learned that pediatricians dissuade the sweet food first strategy. Babies who are fed sweets from the beginning are more prone to childhood obesity and picky eating habits.

As a result, I fed squash and other vegetables first. I even fed my baby scrambled eggs, because some research suggests that limited early exposure to certain foods may reduce the risk of allergies in the future. Of course, there is no genetic predisposition to egg allergies on either side of the family, so I felt safe introducing them.

My little guy still has a sweet tooth like most kids do, but he’ll eat almost anything. He chowed down his broccoli and carrots as soon as he could eat them, and he’ll try anything once. I’m convinced that this is due in part to his first exposure to solids.

5. Get Rid Of Diapers At Two

I don’t fault my partner’s mom for having a straightforward policy in terms of what habits to break and when. She’s taken care of enough of kids to know what’s best. Her hard and fast rules were: Get rid of the bottle and pacifier at age one, and toss diapers for good at age two. The trouble is, one size doesn’t fit all kids.

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I introduced my baby to the potty shortly after he turned one. No pressure; I just let him explore the little toilet and get used to it. He showed some eagerness toward it at first, but it went away for a couple of months.

When his second birthday rolled around, my mother-in-law suggested getting rid of diapers cold turkey. I wasn’t comfortable with potty training in that way. I preferred waiting for signs of readiness, none of which my son was showing at the time. Certain studies show that if children are forced to potty train too early, they might have bed-wetting issues down the line.

We had time. As a work-from-home mom, I planned to have my little guy at home until he started preschool at three-and-a-half. He needed to be potty trained by that point, which I felt confident would happen in due time.

I encouraged him to use the potty, and though he got the hang of going number one by the time he was two-and-a-half, we still used pull-ups in case of emergency. Right around the time he started school, going to the potty full time just seemed to click for him. He was ready, he saw his peers doing it, which I’m sure helped him meet his own milestone.

I’m aware that more traditional potty-training methods work for scores of parents. I also know that many kids used the potty sooner than mine. But it’s not a competition. He didn’t inconvenience anyone by taking his time, and we wasted no tears of frustration by forcing a milestone too soon.

Every day I wish my mother-in-law, my son’s grandma, was still around to share in our family and watch her grandson grow up. Unfortunately, she passed away several years ago. To this day, I am full of gratitude for the advice she dispensed, whether I chose to take it or not. The helpful tips and tricks outweighed the less useful ones, and all were given and received with kindness and respect. If every woman was lucky enough to have a mother-in-law as supportive as mine, there would no longer be a need for bad in-law jokes.

About the Author /

Bernadetta Pracon is a freelance writer and a mom to one little boy. She enjoys coffee, loves dogs, and appreciates her freelance lifestyle.

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Her tips are gold! 💰 {Click 🔗 in bio to read them!}⁠
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📷: @courtney.tracy⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #homeschool #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #learning #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #momsofinstagram #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick #homeschoollife #homeschooling #homeschoolrocks #homeschooler #homeschoolfamily #lifeofahomeschooler #homeschoolmoms #homeschoolkids #homeeducation #homeschoolfun #homeschoolmama
"Domesticity does not equal motherhood. 🙅‍♀ "Domesticity does not equal motherhood. 🙅‍♀️ I once sat in a class where teenage girls said they needed to learn how to cook, do laundry, and clean if they wanted to one day be good moms.

I stopped and told them that cooking, doing laundry, and cleaning are part of being an ADULT. Those are not the things that make up motherhood.

But I get where they got that conclusion.

You always hear women say they aren't good moms when they don't make homemade lunches, prepare cupcakes for the bake sale, show up to the doctor with kids who have brushed hair, or get the laundry put away in a decent time. 'I'm such a bad mom. I sent store-bought Valentines to school with my kid.' 'Mom fail. I didn't get the laundry done.' 'I'm a failure as a mom. I don't make homemade bread/cookies/whatever.' NO.

Your 'success' as a mother is not defined by domestic duties. Domestic duties are part of being an adult.

While your children do need to be changed and fed, that's not the summation of MOTHERHOOD. Anyone can change and feed children, including dads. You can hire someone to clean your house and feed your kids, and you'll still be a mom.

And if you weren't a mom, you'd still have to clean your house, cook food, and do laundry.

You're not a bad mom because you didn't do laundry in time. Let's stop combining domestic duties with motherhood, because they just aren't the same. Yes, moms do domestic things. And they raise children. These are two separate things.

Your housekeeping is not your motherhood, and you're giving away power when you combine the two and judge one against the other.

You are a good mom because you love your child, and you try to help them learn the things they need to learn. You worry about your kids, you spend time with them, you plan for their future, and so much more.

You might be terrible at domestic duties (I don't know) or you might be the best housekeeper in the world. But neither end of the spectrum--or anything in between--determines if you're a good mom or not.

Housekeeping is NOT motherhood."
Words & 📷: @pauseandconnect
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#motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodrising #uniteinmotherhood⁣
And especially now, EVERYTHING is on my mind and i And especially now, EVERYTHING is on my mind and it feels like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. Providing for my family, raising a healthy and well-rounded child, taking care of the house, the pets, nurturing my relationship with my partner. The weight is heavy, but at the same time, I am so grateful for what I have and to be a mom. ❤️⁠
📷: @babysleep_answers⁠
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#motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #mommychick #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣
FOR REAL! Check on your friends with toddlers. We FOR REAL! Check on your friends with toddlers. We are NOT okay. 🤪🙈
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
How you feel at bedtime on what feels like day 382 How you feel at bedtime on what feels like day 382 of quarantine. 😑⚔️💀😂⁠
📷: @thedecentmother⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick #bedtime #goodnight
God bless all of the mamas (expecting and beyond) God bless all of the mamas (expecting and beyond) out there! 🙏⁠ Our hearts are with you all during this time. 💕
📷: @thegingypants⁠
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DISCLAIMER: This is a USED expired PPE from @thegingypants basement. (She is an RN.) Please consider donating any UNUSED MASKS to your area hospitals who are in dire need. 💕
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #pregnant #pregnantlife #expectingmom #pregnancy #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
My "coworker" can be such an a$$hole. 😒⁠ 📷 My "coworker" can be such an a$$hole. 😒⁠
📷: @macaroniandmomjeans⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick #toddlerlife
"30 hours of labor ended with an emergency C-secti "30 hours of labor ended with an emergency C-section... not what we planned but I learned pretty quickly that night that having a plan for bringing a human into the world is a fool's errand. All that mattered was that he got here safely. Having him in the middle of a global health crisis was also not in the baby prep books, but here we are. Holding him and healing my body in a maternity ward that's eerily quiet from us not being allowed visitors or family at this time, but strangely serene. All we hear are monitors beeping and the coos of our infant son. Maybe the sound of the 100th episode of The Office @ryanhurd and I have binged while in here. The admiration we have for the doctors, nurses + healthcare professionals that took care of Hayes & me during our stay cannot be measured in this post. They risked their health every day to make sure ours was okay. I can't think of anything more selfless than that. Ultimately, I can't thank every single mother enough for going through what you've gone through because I had NO idea how hard it could be, and I'm a measly 4 days in. The world is changing before our eyes and so am I. That's been a peaceful thing to cling to during these uncertain times. Thinking of you all. 🖤" - @marenmorris and her birth to her son Hayes Andrew Hurd 💕⁠
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Congratulations, @marenmorris! You are already an incredible mother. Don't dwell on the things that happened that didn't go as planned and that were out of your control. You are safe, you are well, and you have a son. You are a warrior. We are over the moon for you and your family.  Motherhood is an amazing thing. A hard thing. But oh so worth it. We can't wait to watch your motherhood journey. Love & health to you and your family. ❤️⁠
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#birth #covid19 #coronavirus #hospitalbirth #csection #ceseareanbirth #bellybirth #newmom #childbirth #newborn #postpartum #cesareanbirth #pregnancy #momlife #motherhood #newbaby #motherhoodunplugged #babiesofinstagram #babyboy #family #firsttimemom #mommylife #motherhoodrising #momsofinstagram #mommychick #babychick
It's gonna get crazy up in here.⁠ 🧺 (Another It's gonna get crazy up in here.⁠ 🧺 (Another day in the life of quarantine/ motherhood...)⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #laundry #weekend #quarantine #quarantinelife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
🧘‍♀️ Exercises You Should Do Before Givin 🧘‍♀️ Exercises You Should Do Before Giving Birth⁠ 🤰
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Pregnancy and birth are physically taxing events, but they can also be empowering experiences. 💪 Exercising during pregnancy can help the birth process go more smoothly as well as offer other incredible benefits: lowered stress, better posture, less back pain, and less complicated postpartum recovery. 🙌 Best of all, you’ll feel more powerful and in control of how your body is changing and growing. 💗 While most exercise is great even for pregnant women, there are some exercises you really should do before giving birth. Here is what you should do and WHY you should do it. {Click 🔗 in bio to continue reading!}⁠
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#pregnancy #pregnant #pregnancytip  #momtobe #pregnancylife #pregnancyguide #mamatobe #exercise #babybump #pregnancyjourney #bumpie #fitpregnancy #fitmom #preggo #pregnancybasics #pregnancyhelp #maternity #motherhood #momlife #expecting #mumlife #mommytobe #pregnantlife #babyontheway #inspirepregnancy #mommychick #babychick
🗓️ Great Ways to Structure Days Spent at Home 🗓️ Great Ways to Structure Days Spent at Home⁠ 🏡⁠
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If you have kids of any age at home right now, you know by now that structure and routine can help any day go more smoothly. 🙌 Building good habits and activities into your daily routine can provide opportunities for educational learning, play, stress-reduction, nourishment and rest. ❤️ Certainly, not every day has to be structured. And it’s healthy to allow for spontaneity and free time when you’re home together with family. But if you’re looking for a roadmap to build a new daily routine with your children during this season of social distancing, read on for a few fresh ideas! These are some easy tips you can start to build a great structure to your days spent at home. ⁠{Click 🔗 in bio to continue reading!}⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #socialdistancing #homeschool #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #momsofinstagram #learningathome #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick #homeschooling #family #familyroutine #familyschedule #home #structure #parenting
And this is truer now than ever before. 📷 from And this is truer now than ever before.
📷 from the hilarious @honestlymommy⁠
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#motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
👦 Potty Training the Montessori Way⁠ 🚽⁠ 👦 Potty Training the Montessori Way⁠ 🚽⁠
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Potty training can be one of the most challenging endeavors of your baby’s first few years. 😫 But this is a great time to get started if your little one is ready. Rest assured, there are several methods and strategies out there to set you and your baby up for success! 🙌 We decided to borrow some lessons from the Montessori philosophy and apply these lessons to potty training. While potty training the Montessori way may not be for everyone, many parents have used this method and loved it!⁠ Here's what we've learned and how it could help your family. {Click 🔗 in bio to continue reading!}⁠
📷: @curlylittledreams⁠
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#pottytraining #momlife #pottytime #toddlerlife #parenting #toddler #pottytraining101 #pottytrainingtime #nomorediapers #cleverparenting #childdevelopment #toddlers #potty #motherhoodrising #parentingwin #itsmypotty #kids #toilettraining #pottypeople #motherhood #babychick #mommychick #montessori
The struggle is real. 😳⁠😬⁠ .⁠ #coronav The struggle is real. 😳⁠😬⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #socialdistancing #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
🎒 8 Tips from a Homeschooling Mom⁠ 👩‍🏫⁠
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If you’re like many parents and caregivers right now whose children are suddenly home all day instead of at school, and you are now facing the prospect of a crash course in homeschooling, you may have said once (or a hundred times) I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I’M DOING!?!? 😰 You are not alone, I promise!⁠
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I have been homeschooling for years, and yet this pandemic has my family’s entire world turned upside down. We’ve been missing our library dates, ballet classes, afternoons at the playground, chess club, but most of all: our friends. My usually-somewhat-agreeable child has been downright combative and emotionally on-edge these past few days, poor thing. 😢 This quarantine is so hard on everyone, but especially our most vulnerable . . . which includes our children. {Click 🔗 in bio to continue reading about the hows and whys of homeschooling as well as this mama's great tips to help you and your child start learning at home!}⁠
Article by: Bree Von Lopez⁠
📷: @watsonhomestead⁠
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#homeschoollife #coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #homeschool #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #momsofinstagram #learningathome #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick #homeschooling #homeschoolrocks #homeschooler #homeschoolfamily #lifeofahomeschooler #homeschoolmoms #homeschoolkids #homeeducation #homeschoolfun #homeschoolmama
🎵 And IIII . . . . I must confess my hands are 🎵 And IIII . . . . I must confess my hands are clean⁠
When I'm not with you I save our lives⁠
Give me a siiiiign . . . hit my baby now online 🎶⁠
📷: unknown⁠
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#coronavirus #covid19 #quarantine #quarantinelife #motherhoodthroughinstagram #momlife #motherhood #momstruggles #momprobs #mumlife #mommylife #parenthood #motherhoodunplugged #realmoms #momstatus #thatmomlife #realmomlife #momsofinstagram #momhumor #motherhoodrising #ig_motherhood #uniteinmotherhood⁣ #babychick⁣ #mommychick
🤰 10 Ways to Prepare Your Family and Home for B 🤰 10 Ways to Prepare Your Family and Home for Baby Number Two⁠ 👧👶
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Congratulations mama! You're pregnant with baby number two. 💗 How exciting! 🥳 I know, you probably have a ton of thoughts and questions racing through your mind like, "Am I REALLY ready for another baby?!" Or how about, "How do I prepare my family and home for baby number two?!"⁠ 😳
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They're all reasonable questions. However, I want you to remember something. Remember that you probably felt unsure about some things during your first pregnancy and guess what, YOU GOT THROUGH THEM! 💪 Here you are again and yes mama, YOU WILL GET THROUGH THIS TOO!⁠ ❤️
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To help you ease some of those worries, we’re sharing 10 ways to prepare for baby number two!⁠ {Click 🔗 in bio to continue reading!}⁠
📸: @by.sofiehammer
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#pregnancy #pregnant #pregnancytip  #momtobe #pregnancylife #pregnancyguide #mamatobe #babynumber2 #babybump #pregnancyjourney #bumpie #thirdtrimester #preggo #pregnancybasics #pregnancyhelp #maternity #motherhood #momlife #expecting #mumlife #mommytobe #pregnantlife #babyontheway #inspirepregnancy #mommychick #babychick