When you have a new baby, you expect many things. Sleepless nights. Worrying about their eating. Watching milestones and seeing them grow into who they are meant to be. What you don’t expect is the extraordinary impact your baby has on you. How much you will also grow, change, and become who you are meant to be.
I’m a planner. When I got pregnant with my daughter, Ellie, I felt prepared. I knew what bottles I would use, where she would sleep, and even how I planned to parent. I knew our lives would change. But I never planned for how deeply she would change me as a person. As Ellie approaches her second birthday, I can say with certainty that she has made me happier, brighter, and more easygoing. She has made me better.
You Made Me a Better Person
Motherhood has shaped me in ways I never expected. Here are just a few of the ways you changed me.
You Made Me Worry Less
I worry about small things and big things. I worry so much that my husband often jokes he’s not sure there’s a time when I’m not worried about something. Before you came along, I worried about everything. Would you be healthy? Smart? Would you like me? Now that you’re here, I’ve slowly realized I don’t need to worry about you.
You are pure proof that everything will work out just perfectly. In your short life, we have had ER visits, worries about finances, worries about your food intake, regressions, and milestones. But through it all, we’ve come out the other side smiling. You have shown me that worrying doesn’t solve problems, but working things out together as a family always does.
Related: 5 Ways to Worry Less and Enjoy Life With Your Baby
You Made Me Slow Down
I never appreciated downtime quite as much as I do now. And I don’t mean when you nap or fall asleep at night (although those times are relaxing). You have taught me to truly chill out, slow down, and enjoy an afternoon of watching you play with toys. To appreciate days when we don’t change out of our pajamas. You taught me that being busy isn’t as important as embracing the time we have together.
This has not only helped me enjoy motherhood so much more but has also helped me appreciate every aspect of my life, from the exciting to the mundane.
You Made Me Appreciate the Little Things
Before you came along, I always looked at what big thing would come next. I always had to have something exciting—a vacation, a party, a night out—to look forward to, to get through my days. Now, the things I look forward to may seem small, but they make me happier than any big event ever did.
I look forward to your smile when I wake you up in the mornings, watching you explore and learn new things, watching you sleep, and even seeing how your hair grows a bit more each day.
I look forward to seeing you.
Outside of parenthood, I appreciate all those little things I once took for granted—having a loving husband, great family and friends, a comfortable home, and so much more. You have shown me that it’s really the little things that make up a beautiful life.
You Made Me More Compassionate
Seeing you become a little person has made me realize that everyone around me is genuinely doing their best. Small things that used to bother me about friends and family, I now find endearing. Understanding what it takes to be a mother has made me more compassionate toward my parents.
Loving another human as I love you has made me feel more deeply for your father and my friends. It has made me more compassionate about broader issues, such as social justice and equality. It has made me passionate about ensuring that everyone is treated with respect, regardless of who they are, because I would want that same respect shown to me.
You Made Me Happier
Some days, even rough days, I feel like all I do is smile. A bad mood can strike, and then you say something funny, and it instantly vanishes. You have taught me that being angry and upset over inconsequential things is not worth my energy. Your innocence has shown me how to look at the bright side of things. To be more optimistic in all aspects of life. Your laugh, smile, funny faces, and how easily you make me happy have all inadvertently made me happier.
Related: How to Show Love to Your Kids When Angry
You Made Me Who I Was Always Meant to Be
I always knew I wanted to be a mother. But after two years of raising you, I genuinely believe that being your mother was who I was always meant to be. Of course, I have a career and interests outside of motherhood. But the person I have become since you entered the world is the better person I have been striving to be my whole life.
It’s hard to believe that a tiny little human could have such a profound impact on me, but Ellie, you are my greatest gift, and I will forever love you for shaping me into who I am.
I look forward to continuing to grow together. Thank you for making me a better person.
