I felt things changing in my body. But was it all in my head? I’ve wanted a child for so long, and finally, we were ready to have a baby, but am I psyching myself out? All of the emotions were running through me as I was waiting for the pregnancy test result. Would it be a plus or a minus? How would I handle the devastation or excitement? I couldn’t wait one more minute. I had to know the answer . . .
A Personal Story from The Baby Chick®
*Disclaimer: I am being open and honest about my experience. If you don’t want to know the details, I suggest you not read it.
On Monday, January 16th, I had a feeling that I was pregnant. Things were immediately feeling different, but I didn’t know if it was all in my head—if my deep desire to carry a child was affecting my mind and body—or if it was the actual experience of becoming pregnant. My body has always been very sensitive, so I began to overthink every little change. I still went to work that day on the 16th and felt a little extra tired and slightly nauseous. I cast it out of my mind and tried to think nothing of it.
When I returned home that evening, I walked up the stairs to begin getting ready for bed, and my body was aching. Then I felt warm and dizzy as if I was going to faint. As I reached our bathroom, I had to lie down on the cold, hard tile floor to feel better. I had never experienced this sensation, so I knew something was happening.
Over the next few days I tried to keep it out of my mind. But then I started waking up in the middle of the night feeling extra warm. I will never forget visiting New York City for a work trip, laying my head on my hotel pillow, and hearing my heartbeat pumping harder than ever before. All of these tiny signs made me think, “Maybe I am pregnant . . . “I was worried that I was convincing myself that I was when I really wasn’t. I didn’t want to face disappointment.
After the days passed, and it had been four days with Aunt Flow still not showing up—I use the app Glow and it is always highly accurate—except for what I now know was implantation bleeding, I couldn’t wait any longer and had to take a pregnancy test. The next day was the first of February, so I thought that morning I could take the test and start a new month regardless if the results were good or bad. And that’s what I did.
It’s crazy to think that I knew the moment I became pregnant. If this teaches me anything (and hopefully you, too), it’s to listen to my body and never doubt it. It’s constantly telling me what it needs and what is happening. Even today, I’ve noticed my sense of smell and hearing are more sensitive. Nausea also started to kick in around week six, which has been fun . . . but luckily, as I approached my 12th week, things have gotten much better.
I couldn’t be more thrilled and over the moon to meet this baby. But I will admit, I am a little frightened. People probably think I should be calm and cool about what’s to come since I have so much experience with birth and newborns. But I have wanted a baby for so long now . . . and now it’s really happening. Am I really ready? Will I be a good mom? Will I be able to balance my two companies and be there for my child and my husband? I know that every woman has fears and concerns at this point and that what I am feeling is normal. I am reminding myself that everything will be okay and to just take it one day at a time.
To our baby—thank you for choosing us to be your parents. We are overjoyed and can’t wait to meet you.