How Hugging Your Kids Helps Their Brain Development

As parents, we often want to snuggle our little ones. Those moments of closeness are one way to respond to your baby and build the caring relationship that supports brain development.²

Your baby’s brain begins developing before birth. In the first few years of life, more than one million new connections form every second between nerve cells called neurons. Experiences help shape these connections, which support learning and development.¹

How Hugs Support Brain Development

The brain is especially adaptable during the early years. This ability to change in response to experience is called neuroplasticity. Although that flexibility decreases with age, new connections can form throughout life. Your child’s third birthday is not a cutoff for learning or benefiting from your care.¹

When your baby babbles, reaches toward you, or cries, responding with words, eye contact, or a hug creates a back-and-forth exchange. These responsive interactions help build and strengthen brain connections.² Here are some ways to include affectionate touch as your child grows.

Hugs for Babies: Comfort and Connection

Long before babies understand spoken language, they connect with their parents or caregivers through touch. Holding and cuddling your baby can offer comfort and give you a chance to notice and respond to their signals.³

Infant massage is another way to share gentle touch with your baby.³ Talk to your baby as you gently massage them. Make eye contact and talk about each body part while you massage it. As you stroke their leg, you might say, “I am massaging your little leg.” Your baby can hear your voice, see your face, and feel your touch. Naming what you are touching also introduces words for parts of the body.²

Watch how your baby responds, and stop if they seem uncomfortable or no longer want to be touched.³

Related: Why It’s Important To Show Affection to Our Children

Hugs for Toddlers: Encouragement and Emotional Growth

When your child is a toddler, they develop a stronger sense of self and a willingness to step away from you to explore their world. You will notice that they often check to ensure that you are still there and occasionally return to you for reassurance. Offering a loving hug when they come back to you can reassure them that you are nearby, offering support and encouragement. That reassurance can help them feel ready to explore again.

Try to build hugs and cuddles into the daily routine. Young children thrive with routines because they add predictability and stability to their lives. Knowing what to expect can help children feel more secure. Maybe every morning begins with a hug, and every evening ends with a cuddle while you read books to your child.

Related: 5 Tips for Raising an Emotionally Intelligent Child (Psychologist-Approved)

Hugs for Preschoolers and Beyond: Connection That Lasts

As your child reaches preschool and school age, hugs can remain a welcome way to connect. You might invite them to spend 10 minutes cuddling on the sofa after school, if they enjoy it. Give them a chance to tell you about their day, including anything they feel proud of or found difficult.

This time together gives your child an opportunity to share what is on their mind and know you are listening. You can take this snuggle time to process their day, help them understand confusing concepts, and build their ability to communicate. It is also a chance to practice listening and talking through problems together.

If your child does not want a hug, respect their answer.⁴ You can offer to sit nearby, read together, or listen while they talk. Choose a way to connect that feels comfortable to them.

Related: What Is Positive Parenting and Is It Right for You?

The Power of a Hug

A morning hug or a cuddle over a favorite book can be a welcome part of your day together. Follow your child’s lead, and enjoy the closeness in whatever form works for both of you.