Father and Son: What Makes this Relationship Special
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Father and Son: What Makes this Relationship Special

Building a strong father-and-son relationship requires time and effort but can be incredibly rewarding. Discover the ways to bond.

Updated July 5, 2024
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I always say that I am a mother to three sons, a sister to three brothers, a wife to one husband, and an expert on absolutely nothing to do with boys. And while it may be true, I have observed some things during my lifetime, and there is much to be said about a father-son relationship. It is special and unique. A father and son are among the greatest duos there ever was. You are truly blessed if you are lucky enough to have that kind of relationship.

My husband and I didn’t know the sex of our babies until they were born. It was that little surprise that we would be happy with no matter the outcome. So, we waited. Sure, we dreamed of what life would be like with a boy or a girl. We each had the thing that we were looking forward to. And although he never said it, I think that my husband wanted a boy first. Many men do. They want that chip off the old block to teach and love. It is a magical thing.

His Sons are Special

My husband got a boy the first go around. He got one the second and third time, too. He is a proud father of three sons and one daughter, and he loves them wholeheartedly. Yes, our daughter is his angel and does no wrong in his eyes. But there is something so special about those boys. His goal in life is to raise them to be strong, confident, faith-filled, loving men. And he is doing it every single day. Their relationships are all different, but they are equally unique.

Teaching Life Lessons

As they have grown, he, like many dads, has taught them life lessons. A son looks to his father for guidance and to be a role model. He will watch how his father treats his partner and how he treats his children. If he is affectionate and loving, his son will likely also learn to be those things. If he is angry and frustrated, his son could also turn out that way.

My brothers, and sons, have learned from their fathers the importance of a good work ethic. Both men are among the hardest workers I know. They get up early in the morning and will often be doing something work-related into the evening. They have shown their sons that hard work and dedication have afforded them a life that provides food, shelter, and a few extras along the way. Their sons know that it is about more than just showing up. You must put your whole heart into what you do. Being a father is about providing for his family and giving them what they need. My father and husband both take that job seriously.

Fathers are Special to Their Sons

Fathers are also special to their sons. Sons want to make their fathers proud. A son will show his father a good grade on a paper or yell, “watch me!” as he shoots basket after basket into the net. A son wants and needs his father’s affirmation. It builds his self-esteem and makes him feel good about himself when he makes his father proud.

Father and Son: A Team

A father and son are a team. It starts when they are babies, and a dad will show his son his old yearbook and pictures of what he was like as a kid. As they grow older, a son will become his dad’s grocery shopping buddy or the one he shops with at Christmastime. A dad who loves Star Wars or football will count the days until he can introduce his son to his favorite things. It warms my heart to see my husband and our sons interact. He shares his love with our daughter, but it is different when he sits with his sons. It’s as if he is trying to instill something into them that they can carry into adulthood and after he is gone.

Leaving a Legacy

I have watched my father become a grandfather 10 times. And while each of those babies has a piece of his heart, there is something extraordinary about grandson number three. He is his namesake, the third in line. When my dad found out that his moniker would carry on, there were tears in his eyes. My brother wants a piece of our father to live on forever.

All three of my brothers felt it vital for a man’s name to live on. They each have named their sons after themselves. The other two have a junior. They are proud of the men they have become and want that to live on. It is touching to see those little boys and know they will be men like their fathers one day.

More than Games and Tools

A father and son are more than just football games and tools. They are people who love and depend on one another to love and to learn. And don’t think a father isn’t learning just as much from his son. A dad is given a chance to do it all over with his little boy and to see the world through his eyes. His son will teach him about the latest technologies, what words are cool, and what things are cringe. A son will allow his father to come with him on the journey, albeit at arm’s length at times. But even so, his dad will be his go-to man when he needs advice in a challenging situation.

As a mother of sons, I have realized that they come to me when hurt or hungry and need to be nurtured. If they need a puzzle solved or help with their homework, they go to their dad. When I pick them up from school and they have big news to share, they always want to call their dad. His affirmation and love are what make them tick. They need his guidance and help, and that makes my heart proud. He is cultivating their minds and souls just the way he should.

You are incredibly blessed if you have a father. Fathers and sons are lucky; they are born to be together. They should be friends and always invite others to be part of the fun. A son and his dad should learn from one another, even if those lessons are hard or painful. A father and son should love one another while teaching the other how to love. They should take advantage of every moment they have together because even if they get 200 years, it will never be enough.

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Colleen Dilthey Thomas is a mother of four, three boys and one girl, and a freelance writer. She offers her life experience and a bit of wisdom to a variety of parenting sites. Colleen is a Listen to Your Mother St. Louis alum and featured humorist. You can find her work on Scary Mommy, POPSUGAR, HuffPost, INSIDER, Her View From Home, CafeMom, Baby Chick, and more. She loves to bring her unique brand of funny and heartwarming words to her readers.

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