Last month, we looked at Enneagram Type 5 — Investigator Moms. Today we are going to explore the world of Enneagram Type 6 moms. These Loyalist Moms are the skeptics of the group. Here are some ways Loyalist Moms can use their unique personalities to become the best versions of themselves.
Enneagram Type 6 Moms—The Loyalist Mom
Enneagram 6s are almost always anxious, suspicious, and responsible. They value safety and security. They fear a lack of support and guidance. Here are some helpful parenting tips for enneagram type 6 moms:
1. Accept that you are safe and secure.
“We all need somewhere where we feel safe.” – British actress Emma Thompson.
Enneagram 6s tend to fear a lack of support above all else. As a parent who is a type 6, find your safe place both emotionally and physically so that you can be your kids’ safe place while they are young. Prioritize taking care of yourself and your mental health to ensure that you can give your children the support and security they need as they grow.
2. Don’t overwhelm your kids with your fears.
“Our anxiety does not come from thinking about the future, but from wanting to control it.” – Lebanese writer Kahlil Gibran.
As loyalists, Enneagram 6s often struggle with anxiety. Take care not to smother your kids in an effort to protect them. You won’t always be in charge of their lives. Your kids need to be able to make their own age-appropriate decisions without your fears hanging over them.
4. Trust your instincts.
“Hindsight is a wonderful thing, but foresight is better, especially when it comes to saving a life, or some pain.” – English poet and painter William Blake.
Enneagram 6s are uniquely able to anticipate problems before they happen and sometimes even prevent them. As a parent who is a 6, trust your instincts, but don’t let your fear of something going wrong control your decisions. Try to find a workable balance between wisdom and worry.
5. Learn to take healthy risks.
“We can choose courage, or we can choose comfort, but we can’t have both. Not at the same time.” – Professor, author, speaker, and shame researcher, Brené Brown
Enneagram 6s tend to be very cautious, often to a fault. As a parent who is a type 6, prepare your kids for challenges, but don’t scare your children away from taking healthy risks as they grow. Step out of your comfort zone often as an example of bravery for your kids. There are so many things worth doing, even though you are afraid!
6. Teach your kids how to be present in the moment.
“Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow, it empties today of its strength.” – Dutch writer Corrie Ten Boom, whose family helped nearly 800 Jews escape the Holocaust.
Enneagram 6s value safety above all else. Realize that you cannot predict and prevent every negative outcome. It is humanly impossible and only drains you of your energy and joy. Instead of constantly worrying about your family’s future, practice gratitude for previous successes, and focus on finding contentment in the current moment with your children.
7. Show your kids how to choose courage.
“I have not ceased being fearful, but I have ceased to let fear control me.” – American novelist Erica Jong.
Enneagram 6s tend to struggle with fearing potential danger in every situation. They frequently imagine worst-case scenarios and often let their anxiety stop them from following through on big dreams, goals, and plans. Do not miss out on opportunities because of your fears. Each time you choose courage, your next decision to be brave becomes a little bit easier until, eventually, courage becomes a habit and, ultimately, a default.
Next, read about Enneagram Type 7–The Enthusiast Moms!
If you don’t know your Enneagram type yet and want to find out, it’s as easy as taking a test online here. You can read through The Enneagram Institute’s descriptions of the nine types here. There is also a free enneagram-type test available through Your Enneagram Coach here.