A Letter to My Pre-Baby Self

A Letter to My Pre-Baby Self | Baby Chick

A Letter to My Pre-Baby Self

Hey there, hot stuff! I see you, Pre-Baby Self, looking young and rested in the middle of your work day feeling ready to change the world while simultaneously dreaming of what might come next. I see that you have a lot within you to give and that you sometimes wonder the best place to do it.

I know you love achieving goals and you certainly don’t see yourself as ever being a woman that does not have a strong professional identity because you know you were meant to contribute to this world with your mind. And oh you will, but it might look differently than you think.

It’s so easy to always be looking forward to the next big thing in life. But I would encourage you, Pre-Baby Self, to stop and do your best to enjoy the present. Every phase of life does not last forever and each phase offers something special.

So enjoy the benefits that come with this married, pre-child phase.

For starters, stare at your wrinkle-free face and stretch-mark free stomach and smile. One day, your body will not quite look the same. And this is the phase that you will look back on pictures of yourself and say, “Oh my gosh. I used to look so young. Look at how flat my stomach was.”

And you don’t even know it, but your ability to do things for you with ease is at an all-time high. If you want to go to the store and shop for hours, then do it. If you want to get your nails done, then do it. If you want to go out to dinner with friends (and not have to worry about paying a sitter) then you should do it, because it will not always be so easy for you to focus on your own needs. So savor it.

Do it all, but quit rushing through all of it!

Stop and smell the roses while sipping a latte while you can in a place with crowded rows where you would never willingly choose to bring a young child. Then do it again. And again. Because you may not be back for several years after the child-rearing phase has begun.

And when you’re in conversations about or with parents, you need to know that parenting is so much more than you ever dreamed of.  It is not as easy as you think and what you need to know going in is that you have a lot less control of things than you would like to think. So, Pre-Baby Self, try and remain humble in the things you say about what you will and won’t do. I promise, you do not have it all figured out. So it’s better to refrain from judgment . . . unless you like eating humble pie.

Remember when you said, “I would never be a housewife. I don’t understand women who choose to stay at home.”

Ummm. Yeah. About that. You will one day stay at home. And while it isn’t something you ever thought you would do, I promise, it will be one of your favorite things you ever did. So you may want to keep your mouth closed on that one too. And know that each phase of life involves growth and change. It’s hard to imagine where you will be at each phase, so be open to growth. And never say never.

And as far as using your mind, having children will push you to grow and use your mind like you never imagined. It will make you think about things you never knew you could . . . like what you would do if a ball of fire fell from the sky in front of your baby. (P.S. Your future plan for that will be running full force toward the fire ball and stopping it with your she-woman mommy strength love that pretty much will feel like it could stop anything.) And seeing them grow and give back to the world will feel like your biggest accomplishment yet, so know giving back comes from your future babies, too.

Parenting will allow you to experience love in ways you never knew a person could feel.

It is as good as you imagine and then some. You will know new love when you hold them for the first time after delivery, when you preciously watch their little chest raising up and down while they sleep and when you hear your toddler refer to himself in first person for everything he does. Your heart will melt EVERY. TIME. So don’t be scared of the challenges. They ARE worth it.

The women who love motherhood most are the ones who know that like anything in life, part of the beauty of motherhood is that it does push you to grow and will challenge you in ways you never knew possible. When you think it feels hard, just know you’re doing something right. Remember we most appreciate things that reveal our limitations and strengths all at once. And motherhood will.

Lastly, Pre-Baby Self, you know how you always said you wanted three boys?

Well, one day very soon, you get them. Plus a bonus one. Yep, that’s right. You will not only be a mother, but you will raise a big family and you will be viewed as the type of woman that has a big family . . . aaaaaaand . . . you will be that mom who drives a van.

(But you’ll make it look good—sort of.)

So enjoy that little red car while you can. And sleep in. For the love of all that’s good, sleep. Because your story only gets more beautiful as the pages continue, but don’t forget to make the most of the page that you’re on.

Love,

Your Post-Baby Self

About the Author /

Quinn is a wife, boy mom (x’s 4), blogger at Sanctification and Spitup, host of the Renew You Podcast and licensed marriage and family therapist. She loves to encourage others in relationships through her speaking, writing or podcast episodes.

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You're My Baby Forever, But My Newborn for Now⁠ You're My Baby Forever, But My Newborn for Now⁠ 💕⁠
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When I had my first baby, everyone told me to enjoy the newborn stage because it goes fast, and I would miss it. But I was so exhausted and overwhelmed I didn’t believe them. 😴 While I was living through it, it felt like it took forever!⁠
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If you are there now or about to enter this stage, it’s a yummy, delicious, snuggly stage. But for me, it has always been one of the harder ones, every time I go through it. So I see and feel you, mama! It’s physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausting. Hold tight, though, because it doesn’t last forever.⁠
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Daddy Chronicles: Breastfeeding 💙⁠ by @chroni Daddy Chronicles: Breastfeeding 💙⁠
by @chroniclesofdaddy⁠
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I've been asked so many questions by men about fatherhood. So I figured I'd drop some knowledge on my fellow Dads and soon-to-be-Dads. Here's what it looks like for the first few weeks or months after your child is born. Yup. If mom breastfeeds they pretty much are tucked like this and at times you'll wonder "what is there for me to do?" Here are my top 5 tips for any Dad after your child is born.⁠
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1️⃣ For night feedings. When mom wakes up in the middle of the night, you get up and ask if she needs any help or water. The truth is most of the time she will say no but just the fact that you offered will go far.⁠
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2️⃣ Ask mom if she can pump and then pick 1 feeding that you will always do. Mom will take on almost everything and will burn herself out if you let her. At times you may have to force her to rest without worrying about the baby. This is an easy way to do that without a fight.⁠
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3️⃣ Don't put a time limit on how long mom breastfeeds the baby. It's not just about feeding your child it's about them bonding as well. I know everyone has a different length of time they will breastfeed and as a Dad, it's hard to fully understand. Do not, I repeat, DO NOT try and rush this process. It's not our place and it's not safe. You will open yourself up to a fight you can't win.⁠
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4️⃣ Be patient. I know as a Dad the first few weeks we are equally excited and yet not as important. Your time will come faster than you know. Babies grow fast and the stronger and bigger they get the more Daddy Time will be coming your way.⁠
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5️⃣ Paternity leave! If you have it TAKE IT. The early stages of a child's life are not just for moms to enjoy. I know as men making the money especially after having a baby it's hard, but trust me. You can always make money but there are no instant replays in life. It doesn't make you more of a man to not take the leave. It's equally as important that you as a Dad get to be a part of the early development of your child. ⁠
If someone needs this info tag them ❤️⁠
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Absolutely love these tips from @chroniclesofdaddy. 🙌
7 Postpartum Yoga Poses That Strengthen Your Body 7 Postpartum Yoga Poses That Strengthen Your Body After Baby 🧘‍♀️⁠
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The postpartum period, or period of recovery that takes place after a mother gives birth, is an important time for mothers to take care of themselves. 🥰 Typically, if you’re less than 6 weeks postpartum you don’t want to put any pressure on your core muscles. Also, your body’s levels of relaxin, the hormone that loosens joints to prepare for childbirth, is elevated for 3-6 months after childbirth, and longer if you are breastfeeding. All this means is: take these postpartum yoga poses slowly and stretch yourself gently. No gymnastics here or pushing beyond what is comfortable.⁠
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Remember, every mama’s body is different, so listen to how you feel and seek advice from a medical professional if you have questions about how and when to begin your personal exercise plan. Note: Try to do the following yoga poses in the order they are listed. {Click 🔗 in bio to see the 7 yoga poses to strengthen your body after baby!⁠}⁠
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Article by: @kristen_vhmiddleton⁠
📷 taken by: @allisonermon_photography