As much as I appreciate how convenient it is to run to Hallmark and pick out a greeting card for holiday’s like Mother’s Day, I often feel like it’s a little non-personal. Granted, there’s nothing wrong with sending a store bought card. But I like to think that I can express my feelings and gratitude for my mom just fine in my own words. I’m always a little disappointed as I flip through card after beautiful card. They are all written by someone else. How can they possibly understand the way I felt about MY mom?
My underwhelming card buying experience got me thinking about what exactly Mother’s Day means. I questioned what it meant to me as a daughter, but also as a mother myself. Did I want flowers? A spa gift card? A day off from diapers? Or, did I want something else entirely? What would it mean if I spent the day away from the ball of fire that made me a mother. Does that make me a “bad” mom? As I’m rapid-fire questioning my very role, I also began wondering how Mother’s Day began in the first place. Surely, the founders of this holiday didn’t intend for it to become a commercialization of motherhood. Right?
Well, yes and no.
Turns out, the ancient Greeks were pretty into moms. Well, one mom. THE mom. Rhea, mother of gods (like Zeus, Demeter, Poseidon, among other bad-asses of Greek mythology.) She was celebrated prominently with a yearly festival revolving around fertility. So, while the actual celebration of a human mother may not have existed, it did create a foundation for a later recognition of mothers and motherhood.
Later, as Christianity spread through Europe and the UK, a special Sunday service was offered. Parishioners were encouraged to return to their “mother church” for that day. Eventually, that Sunday celebration included a more secular element where children presented their own mothers with small tokens of appreciation.
The American celebration of motherhood didn’t start until the years prior to the civil war and not in the way that one might expect. Ann Jarvis, of West Virginia, founded “Mother’s Day Work Clubs.” These organizations were tasked with educating local women on how to properly care for their children. Later, these same clubs, which had spread throughout the East coast, were unifying agents for Confederate and Union soldiers promoting friendship amongst veterans. This became known as “Mother’s Friendship Day.”
Later still, a “Mother’s Day Proclamation” was issued that called women to unite and promote world peace during the rising Feminist movement. Instead of celebrating one’s own mother, this early incarnation of the day recognized the fundamental role, and perhaps job, of mothers everywhere. To lead, educate, encourage, support, and to love. That is an idea I can definitely get behind.
In the ultimate show of gratitude, the daughter of Ann Jarvis, Anna Jarvis, set out in the early 1900’s to honor her mother’s work. She established a day that revolved around mommas and the sacrifices they make for their children every day.
This is where the modern Mother’s Day was born. Coupling with Anna, John Wanamaker, of Wanamaker’s department store in Philadelphia, staged an event at his store on the same day Anna hosted an event at her Methodist church in West Virginia. While I’m sure Mr. Wanamaker loved his mother dearly, I also believe that he saw the retail value in this holiday. Though, perhaps without the huge success of his event, Anna Jarvis wouldn’t have sought to add Mother’s Day to the official national calendar, which was eventually added in 1914 by President Woodrow Wilson.
The sad ending to this story is that Anna Jarvis eventually saw how commercialized the holiday had become, which was a far cry from what she believed the purpose of the day was. While she supported the purchase of a white carnation to wear in respect of the day, she never intended for floral companies to take it so far. She spent the rest of her days trying to reform the holiday and even get it removed from the calendar.
So How Will I Celebrate Mother’s Day?
I have to confess, after researching about the holiday I was feeling pretty guilty about sending my husband a list of things I “needed” for Mother’s Day. But then I reconsidered. There isn’t any reason why I can’t celebrate motherhood in multiple ways. I know my husband wants to celebrate me and the job I do in helping raise our child (among other things). That’s okay because I appreciate the heck out of his gratitude. I, on the other hand, can celebrate in my own way.
Seeing as how Ann Jarvis meant to create a day of action that showcased the important characteristics of motherhood, I plan to seek out ways in which I can do the same. I have some ideas on how to do this and am looking forward to gathering with some mommy-friends and intentionally celebrating motherhood through service.
I hope you’ve enjoyed learning a bit about the history of Mother’s Day and that you are completely showered with love on Sunday! Let me know how you like to celebrate in the comments below!